Control or Influence

Hey all,



A good friend of mine told me once that as parents, we must go from being in control to becoming an influence to our children. This transition should happen in their early teen years and can (if we are effective at giving up control) become the foundation for a healthy and fruitful adult relationship with our kids. When we let go of the control and take our place as being an influence, our children can grow. And we can experience more life together. Sounds good doesn't it?



But......man is it hard to not want to control? For those of you with older children, you know exactly what I mean right? How often have we tried to "control" our teenager or young adult children? Tried to control situations that we knew we had no control of? How often have we used threats, grounding, bribes, etc. to try and control them or a situation. As my buddy Ron would say......."How is that working out for you?"

For those of us with teens or who have young adult children, we know the answer to that don't we? It doesn't work. And for those of you with young kids......guess what....it isn't gonna work for you either. The more we try and control, the less control we really have.



So check this out. I was reflecting on this today. GOD feels the same about us as adults. HE does not want to control us. HE doesn't need to be "in control", HE is control. Rather, GOD wants to influence us. To influence us in HIS ways and HIS spirit. HE wants us to choose HIM. HE wants us to make good decisions and develop good habits because of HIS influence in our life. HE doesn't want to be in control of us. To give us more rules and discipline. HE wants to have a healthy and fruitful relationship with us. When we allow GOD to take HIS place of influence in our lives, we can grow and experience more life from it. Pretty good advice for us all.



Strength and Honor,



-S